On Driving in England and Being Held Fast

Driving in England can be a bit of a challenge.  Here are a few things that make it difficult, especially if you're living in a more rural setting as we are:

1. Places to turn around are rare and hard to find.  If you miss your turn, tough luck.
2. Places to pull over and park for a few minutes are rare...and hard to find.  And you need places to pull over and park for a few minutes because talking on your phone without a hands-free set is illegal.  So when people are wondering where you are and trying to reach you, you're unable to answer the phone until you find a place to pull over.
3. Country roads can be especially narrow and are usually hemmed in by hedges.  Sometimes it feels like you have to decide if you'd rather lose your left side mirror to the hedge or your right side mirror to a passing vehicle.

James had a birthday party to attend on Saturday, and since KJ was out cycling I took Ella and a friend along.  Right before heading out the door I was unable to locate the GPS.  I made the assumption that KJ had taken it along with him, so after a cursory glance at Google maps and quickly putting the name of the town (I thought) into my phone for emergencies I set out.  Google Maps guessed it would take me 20 minutes to arrive at my destination.  One hour and 10 minutes later we were parked in a neighborhood in I know not what village, awaiting rescue.

Our experience has been that you can get hit with potent reminders that you're living in a foreign country--a country that is not your natural home--seemingly out of the blue.  It usually happens when you're doing a simple task that you are used to doing on autopilot without having to think too much, like going to the grocery store or driving your kids to a birthday party.  Without much warning you can find yourself feeling completely lost, sometimes figuratively and sometimes, like for me on Saturday, completely literally. 

During the "lost" times I can feel lots of different things.  The sheer number and wide variety of emotions I've experienced in our cross-cultural move has been one of the hardest things about it.  It's in the emotional times especially that I'm thankful for truth found in the Bible, something unchanging my soul can find rest in no matter if I'm lost in the middle of farmland or just wishing for the familiar aisles of Wal-mart.

" You discern my going out and my lying down;

you are familiar with all my ways...

If I rise on the wings of the dawn,

if I settle on the far side of the sea,

even there your hand will guide me,

your right hand will hold me fast."

- Psalm 139:3, 8-10 -

In the end, I discovered that KJ didn't have the GPS after all but that in cleaning up for James's party I had put it away in a new place that I then forgot about.  On the positive side, I got in some good driving practice both on the motorway, in the middle of nowhere, and in tiny villages.  For a woman who has her practical driving test coming up in a couple of weeks that's ultimately a good thing.

P.S.  Whenever we miss the way things are done in America, we like to counteract with something positive we love about the way things are in England.  In this case, it's certainly not England's fault that I don't know my way around.  So here's something I enjoy about driving in England:

People use their blinkers/indicators more intentionally.  You have the odd driver here and there but on the whole, drivers seem much more conscientious about using their blinkers than in my experience in America.

This Week's View

KJ is preaching a revival for a friend's church this week, and thanks to the generosity of some friends of the Pugh family, the kids and I got to come along, too.  They've allowed us to stay at their house on the lake only 25 minutes from where KJ is preaching.  It is beautiful with everything we could need, and the fall color is gorgeous.  I've seen 5 deer and a coyote driving to and from town, and oh those trees!  Our location has also enabled us to visit with my grandmother and KJ's brother and his wife and son, so we have been busy.  We're so thankful for all the family visits this week.

The time change has been a bit hard.  For the kids, naptime and bedtime are coming later, and I've been waking up at 5:30.  I was happy this morning that I managed to sleep until 6 a.m., so I'm adjusting!  I woke up just in time to see the sun starting to peek over the horizon.  I rushed out, thankful that my extra sleep didn't cause me to miss this.

 "While the earth remains,

Seedtime and harvest,

And cold and heat,

And  summer and winter,

And day and night

shall not cease."

- Genesis 6:22 -

A sunrise always brings refreshment to my heart.  We're getting dressed in coordinating colors today and attempting a Christmas card picture.  Then we'll be hanging out with KJ's friend and his family before we head into town for the last night of revival.  KJ's done a great job.  Last night James continued to introduce himself as Mario Pugh, and Ella's gum fell out of her mouth (?) into her hair just as we started singing the first hymn.  I had to walk out with her and ended up snipping some of it out.  Just normal stuff for us Pughs.

The Mommy Diaries

So here we are on Thursday, the third full day without KJ.  I've had to do the following things myself:

• clean the hair out of the drain in the shower (for some reason, KJ always takes care of this)
• take the trash out to the road
• hand out vitamins and brush kids' teeth at night
• clean poop off the floor

Now we come to it.  That fourth item has been filling my days since KJ left.  James decided to become terrified of doing this in the toilet, though he does try to make it.  He doesn't want to take the time to just sit and wait it out, so he waits until he's in the process of going to run to the bathroom, just in time to kick off his underwear or pull-up and spread poop on the floor, his legs, and the toilet.  (I'm really trying to write this as delicately as possible.)  It's been such fun.

Last night James was HYPED up.  He ran all over the church, snitching sugar cookies off the table before I could catch him, and generally being a whirlwind of activity.  (Let me add that he is snuggling in my lap as I write this.  Thank goodness he's a snuggler, too.)  I finally made the call to get out of there, and the ride home was so, so loud.  Ella and James went back and forth in the loudest voices possible, while I tried to keep the car in my lane and not lose my mind.  The evening hours are hardest without KJ.  By that point, I've been momming it for 12 hours, and my brain can't handle the noise level anymore.  

So, I'm holding it together, "Almost bedtime, almost bedtime, almost bedtime...".  We get home, and James made a run for the toilet, came back in the living room with no underwear, then started freaking out, yelling for me to put his pants back on.  He just needed to go.  I told him no, that he needed to go to the potty.  He didn't want to, but the situation became dire, and he headed that way.  He did, however, leave little presents across the kitchen floor as he went, though.  

Oh, my goodness.  At that point, I felt so frustrated, but then just started laughing hysterically instead.  And being the 21st-century mom that I am, I took a picture with my iPod.  I'm going to refrain from posting it, but if Instagram is about capturing little moments in daily life that used to go undocumented, that moment qualified.  Poop in the floor has been my life this week, and though one part of my mind felt frustrated and crazy, the other part felt the joy and the craziness of this season of motherhood.  So I laughed.  And then we made this video.  This is my life this week.

Monday's Memories: Walking in Oxford

I loved this bridge.

I also love the nice gossip-y newspaper the man behind KJ is reading.

And the picture above?  This is where I had my narrow escape with a couple of bikes.  I was warned to "mind the bikes" in Oxford, but I really didn't expect to have to take that warning so seriously.  At the end of this road a guy on a bike came around the corner right at me, so I stopped suddenly and moved quickly over.  Unbeknownst to me there was another guy on a bike right behind me, and I jumped right in front of him.  I escaped unscathed.  KJ laughed.  If you ever visit Oxford...mind the bikes.

This post brought to you by...a barking dog.

Our Spring Break week was lovely and relaxing, the slowest week I've had in a long time.  


Combined with the time change, I slept more at night than I have in years, and when KJ had to set the alarm Sunday morning for the early-morning men's prayer breakfast, it was not pleasant.  Monday morning wasn't so pleasant, either.  Deep, restful sleep was nice while it lasted.  


Despite it being sad to send Ella back to school, Monday wasn't a bad day.  It was nice.  Luke came back to our house, and it was obvious he'd grown during our week apart.  KJ and Ella came home with a movie from the RedBox, and I went for a run.  Life sped up a little bit, but things really got hectic on Tuesday.


My very kind and thoughtful husband told me Monday afternoon that he would come home early so I could go get my hair cut and highlighted.  He also said he would stay home with James while Ella and I met my family for dinner to celebrate my brother's birthday.  It was a day busy with an abnormal schedule, but it was filled with good things.  Ella and I had a good drive up the interstate until we stopped at the light at our exit, I reached up to turn off the CD player so I could hear what Ella was saying, and then my car just stopped.  I tried re-cranking to no avail.  But the Lord was so kind.  I only had 5 seconds of panicked, "What do I do now??" before I felt His peace and saw Him immediately provide for every need.


The couple in the car behind me started to drive around us but then saw my flashers come on, and they came back.  The girl got out and asked what was wrong, to which I replied, "I have no idea.  My car just stopped."  She nodded her head at her companion and said, "He knows  cars."  And he did.  He immediately diagnosed the problem (which possibly wasn't too hard when he saw my smoking hot engine).  He "happened" to have some antifreeze with him in his car, so he added some of that, and another kind lady who was at the light a few minutes later provided bottled water from the trunk of her car for us to poor into my sad, empty car.  It really was amazing seeing God's immediate care.  I would have been clueless.  I think I should attend a workshop on basic car repairs.  That would be helpful.  Do they have those?


Anyway, this kind and helpful couple got my car running again and made sure I made it safely to my destination, and my brother and his wife came to my rescue about an hour later.  I had to leave my car behind, and KJ and a friend are borrowing a flat-bed trailer from a church member this afternoon and going to bring my car back home to be fixed.  I don't know what we would do without our church family...or the kindness of strangers.


So KJ's day was made hectic yesterday trying to work out a way to retrieve our car...as well as save our computer.  When I made it home late Tuesday night, I thought KJ and I would relax away the cares of the day.  We did do that, but we also received a message from our computer that "Harddrive failure was imminent."  This was very disconcerting, but I'm so grateful for the message.  I was able to back-up all of our pictures and video (I think), and thanks to yet another member of our church family, we're hoping we'll be able to restore everything, because it did indeed die yesterday afternoon.  Whew.  


It's been a bit mentally exhausting trying to take care of these things while simultaneously teaching two Bible studies (KJ) and taking care of 3 kids, but we've been good.  A lot of things have been breaking recently, but it's just stuff.  It breaks.  All in all, things are pretty good around  here.  


My neighbor's new dog did wake me up early this morning with a round of barking, though...